Remind me to quit complaining...

Maybe I am not complaining on the outside, but on the inside, I am pissed off! I went to get my lab work done again yesterday to check my liver enzyme levels. They were still elevated. BOO! Elevated enough for the doctor to want me to get a CAT scan...this week or ASAP. 

Simmer down. I am picturing that the results will net nothing and the doctor scratching her head in disbelief. I want to come through this test with my arms held high as the winner. F* this side effect. One med that is supposed to keep me from crappy cells growing, promotes other issues. 

Collectively, let us take a moment to be still and know HE is God. I need to breathe deeply and get in my relaxed place. Go there with me and pray for the results to be clear. 

Item #185: Say something nice to someone that annoys you. Shock them into being less annoying. Ha! Just kidding. You will probably just shock yourself. They will not know the difference.

And drink more water!

I love your guts!

Tears of joy or frustration?

Frustration. I am tired of cancer prevention, in the form of medication or multiple medications, result in other types of damage and even more cancer. Damage to other organs, your well being, state of mind and lifestyle.

Frustration. Enough said.

I love your guts!

Adversity

In the face of adversity, the way we handle ourselves and others will show the world our character. Now, I am not sure if this is a saying but it sounds pretty darn inspiring.

Today, many people close to me are facing adversity in their lives. While I am not a proponent of sharing or airing personal items, they will remain unidentified.

Be the first one to show some compassion - with a simple smile, a greeting, or simple wink of the eye. Make someone, even in passing, feel better than they did before they saw you.

My request of you today is simple. Forgive and move beyond your anger because you do not know the adversity someone is facing.  Be the blessing.

Item #4815: I was able to help lift someone up with constructive words that helped them walk a little lighter. Tomorrow, I hope someone will do the same for me.

I love your guts!

Anger is a choice

Oh. My. Goodness. I realize now that when something or someone makes me angry or frustrated, it is because I am being tested. Well, not sure I am going to pass the test every time.

I am taking a 21 day meditation challenge. (Yes, for some reason I am mesmerized by challenges. I think it is my will and drive to win.) Every day I take at least 5 minutes to be quiet and still (not sleeping) and meditate. Then I spend 5 minutes every morning making a journal entry providing content for the following items:

• List 3 things I am grateful for in my life
• Journal about 1 positive experience from the last 24 hours
• Write about an act of kindness I did in the last 24 hours

I may not have an entry for each one of these items, but it is the repetition of taking time to pause and reflect on these events in my life. Studies (I am not sure how well documented and official they are) show that reflecting on positive events and gratitudes in your life release a chemical in your body that make you feel less stressed. I do not remember the term, but I am sure it is some kind of endorphin. At the end of the 21 days, I will pick out some of my entries and share them with you. 

Today's entry was nice and I want to share with you. My one positive experience that happened within the last 24 hours happened this morning. Madison is the ray of sunshine in my life and made me smile from ear to ear. Usually it is difficult getting her up in the morning to get dressed, but today was very easy. When I saw she was dressed, I reminded her that she needed socks and shoes on before we left. I saw her go to her room and a few minutes later, she came out of her room with socks, shoes and a crown. I asked her why she chose to wear the crown and without missing a beat, she replied, "It completes my look for today." I smiled and laughed at bit and agreed with her. Her crown DID complete the outfit. I took this experience and hold onto the smile and the way it made me feel and still grin. I am proud to know she is confident in her choices and support her to continue to walk with confidence.

Item #1585: Soak in the moment of laughter, smiles or simplicity today. Let go of anger and be positive. 

I love your guts!